For the majority of people, they set out a basic plan for how they expect their life to turn out. A big part of that plan is getting married and having a secure and stable life. Unfortunately, things don’t always turn out the way we want them to be, and you cannot go wrong being prepared for an unexpected outcome. There are times when we know that it’s time to part ways and get a divorce. This is an extremely difficult experience, and I’m here to give you some advice to help you get through it.
You Shouldn’t Go Through This Alone
There is a fine line between keeping things under control, being prepared and allowing people to take over. Too many opinions will cloud your judgment and complicate the process for you. This does not mean that you need to go through this difficult time alone. You should keep your closest friends and family members close by so that you can have the support you need. If you continue to pretend that everything is okay and that you’re not having any kind of emotion about the matter, it’s bound to catch up with you eventually, and you will fall apart. You can seek professional help and there is no stigma associated with doing so. There are therapists that specialize in relationships and will be able to help you through your divorce and all the emotions and the ups and downs that come with it. Anything you say to your therapist will not leave that room, and you will get the support and methods to help you get through this difficult time.
It’s Important to Have a Lawyer
You might want to believe that there’s no need to get a lawyer involved, even if the split is civilized and amicable. This is not a good idea because there is paperwork that needs to be taken care of and assets that need to be split. You risk making the civilized split ugly if you don’t have a lawyer involved to help negotiate and take care of all these legal matters. The physical, financial, and emotional stress of a divorce can take a heavy toll on you, and this is why it’s important to have a lawyer that specializes in family law so that you are prepared for what lies ahead. I know what needs to be done and having a lawyer discuss the specifics of the case is better for you so that you don’t deal with any more than you need to right now.
Pick Your Battles
Emotions are always high during the process of divorce. Take a step back and assess the situation before you make any decision. When it comes to splitting assets and talking about who gets what, it’s a good idea not to rush into any conversation. Chances are, your emotions will get the best of you, or arguing for the sake of doing so. Sit and think about what you really need, and let go of the rest.
Understand that it’s a New Chapter
It’s so important to constantly remind yourself that you are about to venture into a new phase of your life, and it’s up to you whether it’s for the better or for the worse. It’s definitely not easy to walk into a new chapter of your life after having lost so much, but you have to learn how to take precious lessons from this experience and apply it to better yourself as you grow. It is time for you to take care of yourself and develop new skills and take on new hobbies.
Divorce is a difficult experience, no matter how understanding and prepared both parties may be. It’s important to understand that this is not a failure on anyone’s part, it’s just an experience you both had together.
Ronald Lieberman, Esq. is a partner and shareholder at Adinolfi, Lieberman, Burick, Roberto & Molotsky, PA in Haddonfield, NJ. Ron has experience helping clients deal with a wide variety of family law matters and has been Certified by the Supreme Court of New Jersey as a Matrimonial Lawyer.